Hi guys and girls,
I wanted to stop by like my mom said I would do and let you all know how much I appreciate your support. As always!!
I was going to try and explain my feelings about my decision, but it looks as if Dave has hit the nail on the head for me already. Thanks Dave! That is EXACTLY what is going on with me.
It was about 5 years ago when I opened my eyes to the “Real World” and realized that I was the only adult in my family as well as my circle of friends that does not have a family of my own. A little over a year ago, I went to my (I hate to admit this,...) 20 year class reunion and everyone was talking about their children and I had the biggest hole in my heart while listening in. All I could think of was the thing my mom always tells me,... She says,.. “When it’s time for me to leave this world, it won’t be the things that I’ve done that I will regret,... It will be the things that I didn’t do, but wanted to.” That saying is a painful reminder to me that I sacrificed the opportunity of being a mother for the opportunity to be a racer.
Maybe some of you guys can’t truly grasp what I am saying, But I KNOW that all of you ladies do. It’s a program that God has installed into each one of us girls. I do NOT regret the past 13 years of my life. Not even some of the DREADFUL mistakes that I made along the way. Just like the song says, God blessed the broken road,... I am who I am today, and I have who and what I have in my life today because of every step I took along the way. I have no regrets. I want to keep it that way. I know that if I don’t stop racing now, I may not stop until it is too late. If I don’t have a family, I will regret it for the rest of my life.
Sitting out last year was not by choice. Lack of sponsorship put me on the sidelines. This was a blessing in disguise! At the beginning of the 2009 season, I was an emotional wreck because I thought my life was over. At the mid way point of 2009, I found myself more relaxed and happy than I have been in many years. I had no idea how bad I needed a break. When the opportunity of a possible Top Fuel ride presented itself, I figured that it was a sign from God that my racing journey was not over. After having to pull out of my adoption process due to financial reasons, and now that there was a chance that I might race again, I just figured that being a mom wasn’t in my cards. It was time for me to deal with it.
At the final hour, Shirley and I received word that we were not getting the Top Fuel deal. I don’t know how to explain the feelings that overcame me. I was happy and sad at the exact same time. I was sad to miss the chance to race with her. To miss the chance to race Top Fuel. But I was so happy because I knew right then what I wanted and needed to do. I knew that I couldn’t let Shirley or anyone else continue to work on finding a deal if it really wasn’t what was in my heart anymore. Shirley was the first person I called to inform of my decision. She was amazing with her words of encouragement. She told me that she wishes me all the best and that she truly understands and supports my decision. I am so glad that she and I become such good friends during all of this.
I chose to officially announce my retirement for one reason and ONE reason only. To show my love and respect to the fans that have shown me respect and love for the past 13 years. I have received tons of emails, myspace messages, snail mail, phone calls, text messages, and in person questions about what and when am I going to race again. I felt as if you guys and gals deserve an answer. So to all of you that do care, THANK YOU for every second of support you’ve shown me!! Those who don’t, continue to amaze me by wasting even a minute of your time and energy on me. Isn’t if funny that they dislike me so much but can’t seem to refrain from including themselves in these posts? Like Grandma always said,...”Controversy = Popularity!” Ha Ha,... even the haters helped to make me more popular in this sport! God Bless em!
So the answer is,... I chose life! The life of a child that I pray God will bless Seth and me with. If a Top Fuel ride presented itself tommorrow, I promise you that I would turn it down. If I am blessed enough to hold a child of my own in my arms one day because of that choice, it will be a choice that I will NEVER regret!
Thank you all, God Bless you all!!! It’s been a wonderful 13 years and I am so blessed to have had the opportunity! I am even more blessed to have stayed out of harms way. Thank God for giving me such a fun ride with NO injuries!! Can I get an “Amen?”
Sincerely,
Angelle
PS Thanks George, for the wonderful things you have always said about me. I will always love you, Jackie, Julie and the entire Star Racing family as my own. Just like family, we’ve had our moments, but in the end, there is always love. You guys are the BEST!!!!!