Dear God (from the dog) (1 Viewer)

[ProStockJunkie]

for all my animal lover friends................enjoy


TO GOD FROM THE DOG


Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell
one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it
still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the
mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a
dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice
ride! Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler
Beagle'?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears
him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand
signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic
energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to
apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must
remember -- to be a good dog.

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw
it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I
like the way they smell.

3. The sofa is not a 'face towel,'. neither are laps.

4. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

5. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

6. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's
driver's license and registration.

7. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the
toilet

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee
table.

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house --
not after.

10. I will not throw up in the car.

11. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes
that noise, it's usually not a good thing. And, finally, My last
question . .

Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?

 

[Alan]

5. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

We have a pic of Lilly with her little head in the fridge, she knows right where we keep the baby carrots that she loves so much, so every time we open the fridge, she pokes at that drawer.

Funny stuff Jackee!!

 

[Suzie Q]

Priceless!!! We all have witnessed those acts before! Love it!

 

[G'ginna]

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I
like the way they smell.

Horse poop seems to be a favorite at my home. I swear they do it when they decide they actually WANT a bath.

 

[Suzie Q]

My friend's mother's dog rolls around in the goose poo! It seems to always happen when they have company coming over too! They live in Minneapolis, so of course they have a pond behind their house and the geese are crappin' away right now!