Alan Johnson tries to replace me (1 Viewer)

[Mike Henkelman]

Apparently Alan Johnson isn't satisfied being the best Top Fuel tuner (possibly ever) and has to get in on my turf: Making with the funny. What am I talking about?

You wake up in the morning, stumble downstairs and brew your first pot of coffee. While it percolates, you let the dogs out and put some kibble in their bowl. You go get your first cup of coffee and sit down in front of the computer with one eye open and check email. Nothing interesting there, so you hop over to the news sites and check NHRA for the latest.

"Alan Johnson leaves Army Team, forms new Team with Shiek from Qatar."

It took about 10 minutes to get the coffee out of my laptop from my initial spray. At first I was trying to figure out who at NHRA could be this funny, and it dawns on me that Geiger is gone and they have no one that could pull something like this off. This is A game. Art.

And it hits me.

Its real.

And all I can think is: God I hope they put the Shiek in the seat. Will he look like Klinger from Cannonball Run? Here's to hoping.

And Alan, posting is about all I have. The judge said either I post on here and make people smile, or I hit the side of the road and pick up trash. Go back to tuning and leave me alone

 

[Just Paul]

LOL That's funny right there.

 

[d'kid]

Hey,

anyone know why we haven't 'heard' from the 'un' real John Force since mid July MIKE?

thanks
d'kid

 

[PJ]

another great Henkelman post...the legend continues

 

[fifty50]

Doesn't that whole story sound like something you'd read on nhra.com on April 1st? I'm very interested to see how this thing plays out...

 

[The Counterfeiter]

Apparently Alan Johnson isn't satisfied being the best Top Fuel tuner (possibly ever) and has to get in on my turf: Making with the funny. What am I talking about?
All I can think is: God I hope they put the Shiek in the seat. Will he look like Klinger from Cannonball Run? Here's to hoping.

Hey Mikey! Get the Awesome Shiek to adopt you - stranger things (including this!) have happened.
I can see it now . . .
"Prince Al Looney Tunes Henkelman" named Crew Chief of Awesome Top Fuel Dragster. You would be stylin' in that nomex Burnoose with a solid gold hard card! -

 

[Mike Henkelman]

Hey Mikey! Get the Awesome Shiek to adopt you - stranger things (including this!) have happened.
I can see it now . . .
"Prince Al Looney Tunes Henkelman" named Crew Chief of Awesome Top Fuel Dragster. You would be stylin' in that nomex Burnoose with a solid gold hard card! -

I think after we blew the heads off it two or three times trying to get her lit, the NHRA would start to get bored with it all. My old man might be the better choice. I on the other hand could start marketing the driver. We get that Revell guy to put together something like this:

Can you guys imagine the interviews???
"I have come from Da Heavens like Thunder to crush this...this...Boodwyzer Red Thing....I will see you in California!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!"

They better use a Rolls as a Tow Vehicle. Maybe Compton will loan them his Bentley <ducking>

 

[Mary]

Hey,

anyone know why we haven't 'heard' from the 'un' real John Force since mid July MIKE?

thanks
d'kid

I was wondering the same thing!

 

[Suzie Q]

Mike............You are not right!!! I love it! Keep the stories coming!

 

[d'kid]

Mike............You are not right!!! I love it! Keep the stories coming!

Problem is, I enjoy Mike's Humor... I understand it...

Now, Has anyone seen the un-real John Force??????


d'kid

 

[none]

I have to admit that I've shared a hotel room with Mike (not the bed). It was an amazing experience...even when he was sleeping you could see his brain working...no literally, his brain would crawl out his ear hole (he has big ears, which is a good thing because his brain is enormous). It would make these strange symbols on the hotel stationary, often using the entire pad. Then it was a quick trip to the head, then to his skull. In the morning Mike would transcribe the notes into the stories we have all come to love and enjoy. True story.

 

[Wayne]

OK; who gets the bill for my new monitor & keyboard?
Mike, Russ, or both???

 

[Roadsters]

Giggling NHRA groupies

For some of us, there are few things that are as painful to watch as someone who thinks he's funny but really isn't, when they're trying to be funny.

If your idea of comedy is making fun of the way a sheik looks and laughing about someone who has the success and good taste to be able to own a Rolls, you might try taking a look at some of the work by people like George Carlin, Rodney Dangerfield, Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Steven Wright.

Dave Mann
(602) 233-8400
Roadsters.com

 

[none]

Re: Giggling NHRA groupies

For some of us, there are few things that are as painful to watch as someone who thinks he's funny but really isn't, when they're trying to be funny.

If your idea of comedy is making fun of the way a sheik looks and laughing about someone who has the success and good taste to be able to own a Rolls, you might try taking a look at some of the work by people like George Carlin, Rodney Dangerfield, Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Steven Wright.

Dave Mann
(602) 233-8400
Roadsters.com

Who do you think killed Carlin...Mike H., Dangerfield? Mike's biological father...Steve Martin's famous line about doing "disgusting things to his dog with a fork", yep, Mike H., Martin Short...who cares? Steven Wright? Mike Henkelman with hair!

Hey Wayne, I'm almost afraid to ask - but what is that stuff on your monitor/keyboard? Mike said he'd take care of it this time.

 

[Wayne]

Mike: thanks for the monitor/keyboard!!!
Russ: no worries; it was just iced-tea!!!

 

[HEMI6point1]

Re: Giggling NHRA groupies

For some of us, there are few things that are as painful to watch as someone who thinks he's funny but really isn't, when they're trying to be funny.

If your idea of comedy is making fun of the way a sheik looks and laughing about someone who has the success and good taste to be able to own a Rolls, you might try taking a look at some of the work by people like George Carlin, Rodney Dangerfield, Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Steven Wright.

Dave Mann
(602) 233-8400
Roadsters.com

The "sense of humor" is available in isle 3. I suggest you pick one up.

 

[Mike Henkelman]

Re: Giggling NHRA groupies

For some of us, there are few things that are as painful to watch as someone who thinks he's funny but really isn't, when they're trying to be funny.

If your idea of comedy is making fun of the way a sheik looks and laughing about someone who has the success and good taste to be able to own a Rolls, you might try taking a look at some of the work by people like George Carlin, Rodney Dangerfield, Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Steven Wright.

Dave Mann
(602) 233-8400
Roadsters.com

Dave, thanks so much for tipping me off. I had no idea that this pathetic group of vultures has been ripping off my bit about a Shiek funding a race team and how it would be wild to see them in the drivers seat...especially as this particular group of comics hasn't done anything funny since Bush Sr. was in office. I talked to my attorney's and they claim we have a serious case if this is true. Could be some pay day.

To show my thanks and unconditional respect and admiration, I have taken to posting the following on the Craigslist singles section:

"Aging Attractive Millionaire Cross Dresser seeks bedroom friend for fun and party games. Leather, Whips and Watersports a plus. Those who seek the freedom of revealing their true kinky nature need look no further.
Dave Mann
(602) 233-8400"

Now for the educational part of our show....have you ever wished that porn had a "special features" section for outtakes? See over here (Rated PG)
YouTube - porn Blooper line mess up

PS: Russ Parker is running for President in 2012. You heard it here first. Miss you man!

 

[HEMI6point1]

Mike! Good thing I wasn't drinking something!

 

[none]

Re: Giggling NHRA groupies

PS: Russ Parker is running for President in 2012. You heard it here first. Miss you man!

Hey Mike - miss you, too. Say hi to your old man. By the way, will you be my Sarah Palin?
Our first campaign promise is to have spill-proof monitors and keyboards for everyone....who votes for our ticket (the rest of you will have to do with the old stuff). And computers that never cra

 

[none]

sh....sorry about that, had to reboot.